Tag Archive | making decisions

Decision Fatigue is a Real Thing

May1

This post is part of the 5-minute Friday link up. We write for just 5 minutes on a one-word prompt and see what happens. No heavy editing, just writing. You can see all the posts from this week on the link up. Here’s what I came up with today with the prompt “decision.”

We have had so many decisions to make over the past, well, year probably. Just about a year ago we had to make the heartbreaking decision to release our beloved kitty Stella to cross the rainbow bridge. We also have her twin sister, Luna, and it tore us apart to watch Stella fail very quickly in just under a week.

But our latest round of decisions was so much harder. Every day there seemed to be some life-altering choice that needed to be made regarding my mother-in-law’s hospital stay. First, should she even go to the hospital? Then came the harder decisions of what kind of treatment would be best? What about rehab? What place? Is she actually getting better? What happens if she is able to go home? And then, when things went further downhill, the questions became Would she want to be on a ventilator? How long do we let this go on?

Ultimately, the hardest decision was to stop all treatment when the future would look like her being hooked up to machines.

And then, just four days after her passing peacefully in the night, my sister-in-law had a heart attack. The decisions her sons had to make for their 63-year-old mom, who previously had been healthy except for some painful foot issues, wrecked us. The ultimate decision to stop life support after learning her brain damage was massive and irreversible left everyone completely drained.

And then we had to plan their service. A myriad more decisions laid in front of us.

Decision fatigue may not be a clinical diagnosis, but those of us who have experienced it know the emotional and physical effects it can have. As we turn the page into a new month, now six weeks removed from our loved ones actual deaths, we focus on rest. There are still some decisions to be made regarding probate and all that, but we’re all together. We can lean on each other and share the load.

“Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ” (Galatians 6:2, ESV)

Eeny, Meeny, Miney, Moe

Apr11

question-markSome people love to make decisions. It comes easily for them. I have one son who, when he had money in his pocket, wanted to go right away to the toy store so he could spend it on whatever he fancied. I have another who would walk the aisles, mulling, thinking, considering, and then walk out without anything because he couldn’t decide which thing he wanted.

That decision-making process only gets more difficult as time goes on, and the biggest is right around the corner: college.

My mind spins when I think about all the decisions coming up quickly for my eldest. And all the tasks: SAT, ACT, Air Force Academy application, senate nominations, college applications, ROTC scholarships, etc., etc., etc. It’s overwhelming. What if he doesn’t have a high enough GPA? How do I motivate him to study? How many times should he take the SAT? What if we do something wrong in the Academy application? Will that ruin his chances? And how in the world are we going to pay for college if he doesn’t get into the Academy or get a major scholarship?

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?” (Matt. 6:25-34).

Ahhhh. Isn’t that just like our Heavenly Father to comfort us with the equivalent of “I’ve got this.” The decisions still have to be made, and the tasks still have to be completed, but the weight is not on us. Do your part; trust God with the results. I don’t have to fear that my son won’t get into the Air Force Academy. If that’s the ultimate plan for him, he’ll get there—not by sitting and waiting for God to move, mind you, but by working diligently and trusting God.

It’s such a delicate balance: work and faith. You want to trust God for a job, but you can’t sit in your recliner waiting for bosses to come knocking. You want to know where God wants you to go to college, but an acceptance letter isn’t just going to magically appear in your mailbox.

I think what God wants is for us to walk closely with Him every day, to talk to Him about everything, and trust that He’s got our future under control. Do I know where the finances are going to come from to send my kids to the colleges of their choice? No. Not completely. But we started college funds for them, we encourage them to do their best in school, and we’ll apply for financial aid and every scholarship for which they qualify.

And we’ll leave the results to God.