This post is a part of the Five Minute Friday link up. We write for just 5 minutes on a one-word prompt, without heavy editing, and see what happens. Today’s word is “deserve.”

When I was in junior high school, I really wanted to earn the Service Award at the end of my 9th-grade year. I volunteered in the library, I was an office helper, I worked what they called back then OWE, which stood for Outside Work Experience. That meant that I could have a volunteer job somewhere outside of school. I went next door to the elementary school and helped out in the 1st-grade classroom.

So at the end of the year commencement ceremony, when all the awards were announced, I felt pretty confident that I deserved that award. My heart raced as they started with the announcements. And then, my time came: Winner of this year’s service award: . . . Ann.

My heart sank. It wasn’t me. It was Ann. Ann who always won. Who was popular. Who was cute.

I couldn’t find it in my heart to rejoice for her. I was outraged that I hadn’t gotten the award I was sure I deserved. I never won anything.

It wasn’t fair.

I’d been robbed.

She must have been the administration’s pet.

There didn’t seem to be any reason in my little adolescent mind that I should not have gone home with that award.

You would think that 40+ years later, I wouldn’t remember that day. But I do.

What I don’t remember is if that made me work harder in the future, or made me just want to give up because there was no chance of my ever succeeding.

There have been many other disappointments since June of 1977. And so I have had to set aside my pride, which isn’t easy for one whose personality craves applause, and listen only for the applause of God.

And now the prize awaits me—the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give me on the day of his return. And the prize is not just for me but for all who eagerly look forward to his appearing.
1 Timothy 4:8 New Living Translation