When Terror Came To My Town

Jun15

I live in Orlando and have for the past nearly 25 years. I can distinctly remember where I was when the attack on September 11, 2001 occurred in New York. I was shocked and appalled because this was the first terrorist attack on American soil and I watched it play out. I remember reading about the bombing at the Boston Marathon, but I live far from there. I used to live in San Bernardino, so I paidP1030009 a little closer attention to that attack.

Sunday was a whole different story.

I don’t frequent the downtown area. I live about a half hour away. I had heard of The Pulse nightclub, but had never seen it before. I don’t know anyone who was killed or injured in Sunday’s massacre. But I have friends who were directly affected. And every time I open any social media app, I’m bombarded with images or words. This time, terror came to MY town.

But something hit me last night as I watched “How to Train Your Dragon 2” with my husband and daughter. If you haven’t seen the movie, the following is a spoiler, so you may want to skip a few paragraphs. In the story, Toothless, a Night Fury dragon, is held captive to a “spell” by the alpha dragon of an evil tyrant bent on destroying pretty much everyone. Toothless’ best friend, Hiccup, tries to reach him, but the hold is strong. While under this “spell,” Toothless attacks and kills Hiccup’s father, Stoic.

Understandably, the attack devastates Hiccup and he lashes out at Toothless, angry and grieved. But Hiccup’s mother tells him that she knows Toothless didn’t mean to. He was just under the control of the alpha and couldn’t do anything about it. The draw was too strong.

In the end, with love, gentleness and patience, Hiccup reminds Toothless of their love for each other: “I’m right here, Buddy. You’re my best friend.” Toothless is released from his spell and is able to help vanquish the evil one.

What does this have to do with a terrorist attack? Or a lunatic killing an innocent singer, or anyone who hates and kills and destroys?

Because, believe it or not, those who do such things are not our enemies. Omar Mateen is not our enemy. Radical Islamists are not our enemy.

Satan is our enemy. Satan has taken control of some. And Satan is in our city.

Have you heard hatred and blame spewed on blogs and Twitter in the past 4 days? That’s not Jesus speaking. That’s Satan.

In the Bible, Peter, one of Jesus’ disciples writes, “Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour” (I Peter 5:8).

Omar Mateen was devoured by Satan. Like Toothless, he had no choice but to do what he did because he had allowed hate to fill his heart. Those who have hate filling their hearts can do nothing but evil. Make no mistake, I believe Mateen is responsible for his choices, and he has lost all hope of redemption because he is dead.

But for all who still have breath in their bodies, there is hope. Hope that good will overcome evil, but only if they put off all evil in their hearts. Do not, I beg you, give Satan a foothold by listening to his lies and perpetuating them.

Do Christians hate gays? No. But Satan does. Satan hates everyone.

The thief (Satan) comes to steal, kill and destroy. Sound familiar? But Jesus came that we might have life, and have it abundantly (John 10:10).

Choose life. Tell Satan he can’t have your city. How do you do that? By living like Jesus. Serving, loving, valuing life.

Oh, and I’ve read the last chapter of the Book.

Satan loses. Jesus wins.

The Robe

Jun2

The last time I saw my mom alive,IMG_6503 9 years ago this month, she was wearing her favorite big, fluffy bathrobe. Undergoing treatment for pancreatic cancer, she sensed her struggle was coming to an end and she didn’t have the wherewithal to get dressed most days. While I was with her, a hospice nurse came in and talked to us about the future. We arranged for Meals on Wheels to bring food several times a week. I talked to the postal deliverer about bringing her mail down to the front door because her mailbox was at the top of a steep driveway.

She was still sleeping in her bedroom which was on the lower floor of the house where I grew up, so she had enough energy and strength to climb the stairs every morning. But she was growing weaker.IMG_6502

I didn’t know that was the last time I would see her.

After she passed away, my sisters and brother and I went through all the things in the house (my dad had passed away 16 months previous) and chose what we wanted to take home with us, what would be donated, and what would be thrown away.

I chose the robe.

That old robe is getting a little ratty, but I can’t see myself ever wanting to let it go. It doesn’t smell like her anymore—she’s been gone too long—but it still looks like her, and that’s enough for me.

Would I rather hear her voice over the telephone line? Of course. Would I prefer to get a letter in the mail with the latest photographs of whatever she wanted me to see? Absolutely. But instead, I have this old robe. And it’s precious to me.

IMG_6501Miss you, Mom. You would be proud of your grandkids. The one who had a baby almost a year ago and would have made you a great grandma. The one who graduated from college this year and already has a job. The ones who got married and are making new lives for their families. The one who opened his own business and has been written up in several publications because of it. The one who started college and wants to be a law enforcement officer. The one you never met, who learned to tie his own shoes and loves Star Wars. The one who loves horses just like I do and takes riding lessons and has been in horse shows. The one who will be a high school senior and is trying to figure out where he wants to go and what he wants to do.

And so I wear the robe. It holds me close when my mom no longer can. No matter how ratty it gets, that robe isn’t going anywhere.

 

 

 

Ducks In My Driveway

May12

My husband built me a koi pond for our front yard about a year and a half ago. Since then I’ve been able to enjoy watching my fish grow from abut 2″ to more than 12″ each. They are lovely. Just yesterday, 2 mallard ducks decided to joinIMG_6386 us in our yard. They are a beautiful pair, calm as could be, letting us come within a foot of them with no problem. I have a bird feeder in my yard, so I grabbed the bag of seed and scattered some on the driveway for them. The sprinklers were on, so they enjoyed getting wet and sipping in the puddles.

Then they began to show interest in the koi pond. Uh oh. I wondered if that was a good idea. Would they scare my fish? IMG_6391Could they harm them? The fish are almost as big as they are, so I didn’t figure they’d eat them, but would they hurt them in some way? Luckily, the drake just jumped on the side, looked for awhile and then waddled away. But today, they were back again, and this time, they thought they’d take a little swim. The koi don’t seem to mind, but I was concerned about possible parasites or bacteria from wherever else they’d been. IMG_6403I did what every rational person does at a time like this: I googled it. “Ducks in my koi pond.” And of course, I came up with as many opinions as there were answers. Tame ducks are OK, but stay away from the wild ones (that should be true of our friends in life, too, shouldn’t it? haha). Ducks add interest to your pond, let them stay! If you attracted ducks, you’ve done something right!

I’ve decided to let nature take its course. They’ve already helped me out by eating the pink apple snail eggs that tend to line the edges of the pond, so that saves me from having to scrape them off. And they’re just so darn cute! My husband is hoping they’ll build and nest and we’ll have babies eventually. I’m not sure whether that will happen or not, but for now, we’re enjoying the company. IMG_6401And yes, that means all of us.

My question is: why are they suddenly finding our yard attractive? Where did they come from? Will they be sticking around? If only we could speak duck.

Sometimes we all find ourselves in circumstances different than what we’re used to. What’s that saying? Like ducks out of water? We’re uncomfortable, we’re frightened, we’re unsure of what we’re doing. Sometimes we just have to find IMG_6396
what’s familiar. Is that some water over there? It’s smaller than what we’re used to, but let’s just go with it. The fish look pretty friendly. Maybe someone will toss us some seed every now and again.
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Eventually, wherever we are, we will settle in and life will become normal again. New normal, maybe, but normal nevertheless. Whether we stay in that new place, move on to another or go back from whence we came, God sees us, He goes ahead of us, and He knows what we need.

 

25 Years and Counting

Mar30

4 weeks ago today, David and I celebrated our 25th anniversary. I know it’s cliché, but honestly, time has simply flown by. I was 29 when we got married (go ahead, do the math. I’ll wait.) I wasn’t a spring chicken, but that just meant I brought more maturity into the relationship, right?

We’ve come a long way on this journey, and we still have a long way to go, Lord willing, but here are some things I’ve learned along that journey.

You can run, but you cannot hide. Well, yes, you can hide, but then you won’t be known, nor will you know anyone fully. Hiding might make you feel IMG_5215better for awhile, but eventually you’ll need to come out of your shell. Coming out of hiding does make you vulnerable, and it’s not comfortable, but it’s so worth it to know that somebody knows you well. And loves you just the same.

You might not always know where you’re going, but if you’re walking together, you’re not lost.IMG_5222

We didn’t know when we got married that David would be diagnosed with a chronic illness. We didn’t know that we would struggle to have children. We didn’t know that we would suffer 3 miscarriages before and between our 3 beautiful kids.We didn’t know I would lose both of my parents within a year a half of each other. We didn’t know that David’s parents would divorce after 48 years of marriage. We didn’t know we’d need counseling to get our marriage back on the right path. But we walked it together. And that made all the difference.

The enemy of our souls doesn’t want us to succeed. When we IMG_5224attended a marriage conference after about a year of marriage, we heard a life-changing truth: your spouse is not your enemy. Seems simple enough, doesn’t it? But how often do we blame our spouse for our troubles, or take our frustration out on them, or think that they purposely do something to hurt or annoy us? David is not my enemy. In fact, he’s my greatest ally. It’s Satan who seeks to kill, steal and destroy. And he’s always looking for opportunity to do so. Don’t give him any ground.

Sometimes the directional signals are hard to find, but they’re always there. IMG_5223When life is just going along—you’re raising kids, working your job, living your life—it’s easy to forget to keep asking the Pathmaker where He wants you to go next. I recently was asked to step down from a position that I had filled for many years. It came as a surprise and wrecked me for awhile, but as I was thinking it through, it occurred to me that I had never once stopped to ask the Lord if He still wanted me to do what I was doing. I thought it was a foregone conclusion because I was good at what I did. But stopping to look around and find those arrows that will point us in the right direction is vital to not being taken aback when something happens to our neat little life. David and I have experienced a few of those changes in direction in our 25 years, but we always acknowledge that God is the one laying out the path before us.

Version 2

December 25, 1991, year 1

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December 23, 2015, year 25

photographs taken in the Chuluota Wilderness Area, Chuluota, Fla.

Hold Onto Hope

Feb26

IMG_2048Awhile back, I wrote a post about my avocado tree. (See The Beetle Within Us) I was sad to have to report that, after just a year of bearing fruit, the tree had to be taken out because it was diseased by the ambrosia beetle. Well, we had a storm more than a year ago that knocked down part of our back fence near where the tree used to grow. In removing the old fence, my husband came across this 18-inch-high seedling that had been growing from a pit discarded by the squirrels in the corner of the yard.

Imagine our surprise and our pleasure at finding this small glimmer of hope that we could still have a healthy avocado tree in the future.

This seemed to me a perfect analogy for the life of a prodigal: There is always hope that there is life left in those who wander from God.

When the new fence panels went in, the seedling was transplanted to our front yard. It was so small back then, and it was hot out, so daily, even twice-daily, watering was vital for its survival. It’s now more than 10 feet tall. It is surrounded by other plantsIMG_5551, yet given its own space. When it was still very small, we could watch it, we could nurture it, we could pray that it would grow big and strong and eventually produce fruit. All we could do was give it the best environment that we knew how to give; the rest was, and still is, up to its Creator. It hasn’t borne fruit yet, but we hope it’s well on its way.

I recently read a phenomenal article by Abraham Piper, the son of pastor and author John Piper, whom I greatly admire. Abraham was a prodigal for many years, and his insight into how to love prodigals back to Jesus is something I think everyone struggling with this should read. The article is quite long, so you can read the entire text here (Let Them Come Home). The following points are his, with my condensed interpretation.

1. Point them to Christ.Piper contends that the real problem with your prodigal is not their behavior, it’s that they don’t see Jesus clearly. Therefore, the best thing you can do is show them Christ. Their only hope is to clearly see Jesus and His love for them.

2. Pray.
“Only God can save your children, so keep on asking Him to display Himself to them in a way they can’t resist worshiping Him for.”

3. Acknowledge that something is wrong.
Don’t pretend that everything is fine. Don’t ignore their unbelief. Reach out and keep reaching out.

4. Don’t expect them to be Christlike.
“No matter how your child’s behavior proves his unbelief, always be sure to focus more on his heart’s sickness than its symptoms.” If they’re not believers, they’re not going to act like believers. Hearts need to change first.

5. Welcome them home.
No matter what they’ve done, if they want to come home, let them. If they have any desire whatsoever to be with you, let them come. You are going to be the best influence in their life. Make sure you aren’t pushing them away.

6. Plead with them more than you rebuke them.
Piper says, “Be gentle in your disappointment. . . Her conscience can condemn her by itself. Your role is to stand kindly and firmly, always living in the hope that you want your child to return to.”

7. Connect them to other believers.
If you know another believer you think might reach them better than you can, by all means, get them together.

8. Respect their friends.
Be hospitable. Her friends are someone else’s wayward children, and they need Jesus, too.

9. E-mail them.
“When you read something in the Bible that encourages you and helps you love Jesus more, write it up in a couple of lines and send it to your child. The best exhortation—better than any correction—is for them to see Christ’s joy in your life. Don’t stress out when you’re composing these as if each one needs to be singularly powerful. Just whip them out and let the cumulative effect of your satisfaction in God gather up in your child’s inbox. God’s Word is never useless.”

10. Take them to lunch.
Have actual facetime. Even if it may hurt to hear what they’re up to, do it anyway. Your interest in them as a person will speak volumes to them. Make the time to get together.

11. Take an interest in their pursuits.
Find value in what they like. Ask questions. Hear their heart.

12. Point them to Christ.
“This can’t be stressed enough. It’s the whole point. No strategy for reaching your son or daughter will have any lasting effect if the underlying goal isn’t to help them know Jesus.”

Be faithful and don’t give up.