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Parental Guidance–a movie review

parental guidanceOn one of our recent dates, my 10-year-old daughter and I went to see the movie “Parental Guidance,” which stars Billy Crystal and Bette Midler. A friend had given it rave reviews, so I thought we’d give it a try. I was not disappointed.

The story revolves around Artie, a minor-league baseball broadcaster, and his wife, Diane, an eager grandmother who doesn’t meet her high-control daughter’s standards for proper upbringing. When the daughter, Alice (played by Marissa Tomei), and her husband find themselves in need of a babysitter for a week, she reluctantly calls on her parents.

The resulting antics are pretty hilarious: The kids, who aren’t given sugar by their parents, are given an ice cream cake by their Grandpa, who doesn’t get why such rules are in place, with the expected results. The youngest, Barker, who has an invisible kangaroo friend named Carl, gets into all sorts of situations resulting in many laughs. A confrontation by Artie with the speech teacher for the stuttering Turner and by Diane with the violin teacher for granddaughter, Harper, and the disparity of parenting styles is painfully apparent.

But the hilarity was not what impressed me most about the movie; it was the fact that Artie and Diane are committed to each other after 35 years of marriage. That was refreshing, coming from Hollywood. Diane asserts that she wants to become important in the lives of her grandchildren. She’s asking Artie, who had just been sacked by the baseball team for which he had worked for decades, to be on his best behavior for the week, knowing his antics could get them in hot water with their daughter. Artie tries, he really does, but his innate outspokenness and self-absorption gets him in trouble sometimes.

Like when they take the kids to Turner’s baseball game and learn that they don’t keep score in this league. For a baseball purist like Artie, that’s sheer foolishness. And he makes that clear to the gathered parents around him, many of whom agree.

Confronting Artie’s selfishness one night, Diane says to him, basically, “I’ve supported you for 35 years without complaint (well, with a little complaint), and all I asked of you was this one week to be about the kids. It’s not about you, Artie. It’s not about you.”

One of the sweetest scenes in the film was when Artie comes home from just having lost his job, and Diane tells him that he’s the best baseball announcer in the business and they really messed up when they let him go. Her love and support of him were genuine and she didn’t belittle him or make him feel like a failure.

Besides Artie and Diane’s impromptu song and dance to “Who Wrote the Book of Love” in the middle of the kitchen, the scene that struck me the most was a conversation between Diane and Alice. Alice wants to argue with her mom about something Artie did, but then she says, “No, you’ll just take his side. You always take his side.”

Diane’s answer is poignant: “That’s right, and you know why? Because when the kids are all grown up, it’s the husband who stays.”

In this kid-centric society we live in, where marriages are a dime a dozen, giving priority to your spouse is not a very popular modus operandi, but oh, how important it is.

Thanks, producer Billy Crystal and the rest of the “Parental Guidance” gang for giving such a positive, funny, tear-inducing picture of what marriage and family is all about: not perfection, but commitment and love.

You can read Plugged In’s review here.

Thankful today for:

841. the ability to sit outside in shorts and a T-shirt on a middle-of-February day

842. able-bodied helpers around the house

843. a late 14th-birthday celebration dinner

844. enthusiasm

845. new pants for $5

846. a hardworking husband

847. Linky parties 🙂

848. the opportunity to post on other peoples blogs

849. guest posts on my blog (hopefully coming soon)

850. God’s provision

Come Out, Come Out, Wherever You Are!

ImageWe have a couple of varieties of animals that have become worrisome for me. Our hermit crabs, Alex and Titan, have been buried since the day after we brought Alex home from the pet store to replace our dear departed Charlotte a couple of days after Christmas. Hermit crabs, if they are healthy, molt on a regular basis, shedding their old, tight exoskeleton for a bigger and shinier one. (Well, maybe not the shinier part, but you get the idea.) From what I’ve read, that’s a very stressful process for them and, depending on their size, this can take many weeks, maybe even a couple of months. What’s hard for us is the waiting. They know what they’re doing naturally, but they are hidden from our sight, not eating, not drinking, not seeing the light of day. It’s been more than a month now, and I’m beginning to worry that they didn’t make it.

Our second worrisome set is a trio of kuhli loaches we bought to help control the snail population in our aquarium. They had been recommended by my fish guru, Tiffaney, who assured me that these eel-like creatures would be munching escargot soon. Well, I can’t find them now. They’ve shown themselves a few times, but rarely, and the snail population flourishes. I don’t know much about them, but Tiffaney says they’re shy, and the forums say they like to bury themselves, but I’m beginning to fear they might not be alive either! We purchased three, and at any given time I’ve only seen two, and the last time was several days ago, maybe even a week. Loachies! Come out, come out, wherever you are!

Crabs and loaches. And God.

Do you ever fear that He might not be around anymore? Does it seem like a really long time since you last heard from Him?

John 20:29 records this interchange between Jesus and Thomas, His disciple: “Then Jesus told him, “Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.'”

I’m not sure about the kuhlis and the crabs, but I know about God. Enjoy this song from The Newsboys, declaring the truth that He is alive!

Thankful today for:

789. my singing bird

790. fast-moving clouds doused in sunrise

791. maturity

792. the freedom to gather and pray

793. godly leaders

794. new friendships

795. education

796. spontaneous visits from faraway family

797. surprises

798. new life

799. laughter

800. music

801. talented people

802. mistakes overcome

803. the journey

804. new stuff

805. reminiscing

806. indoor plumbing (just sayin’)

807. my students

808. a breeze

809. books

810. quiet

What Is Truth?

truthWe have been inundated lately with ‘fessers; those who now feel the need to come clean on some sin of the past about which they have been silent heretofore. Lance Armstrong comes first to mind. I supported the guy. Never failed a drug test, yadda, yadda. Remember O.J? I didn’t think there was any way he could have committed the terrible crimes of which he was accused. I’d seen him run with a football. I knew him. I have a Barry Bonds bobblehead on my shelf. I’d like to believe him. Recently we’ve been hearing about Notre Dame football player Manti Te’o. He is denying having a role in the dead-girlfriend hoax. I don’t know him at all, but I’d like to believe him. I’m all for the “innocent until proven guilty” way of doing things.

Those are some athletes I can think of.

Don’t even get me started on politicians.

Movies that depict the good guys, like police officers or firemen, going bad make my blood boil. I was a faithful watcher of the TV show “24,” but I was always so irritated by the traitors, the evil infiltrators who lied and schemed and made people trust them. Made ME trust them. It’s just not right.

There is something deep within us that wants truth. We want to be able to trust people. Those who lie to us break our hearts down deep inside. I don’t want to become a cynical person, but the plethora of public liars puts us at a disadvantage. Who, really, can we trust? If my spouse says he’s not cheating on me, can I truly believe him? If my sons say they aren’t looking at pornography on the computer, do I take them at their word? (Yes, but I also have a filtering and accountability program on all the computers.)

Where is the integrity? Who can we really trust?

In John 14:6, Jesus declares, “I am the way, the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” Phew. Finally. And how can we know that we can trust Him? Look at His track record. Has He ever not followed through on something He said He was going to do? Has He ever told us anything that wasn’t true? That’s what got the pharisees so upset: He told the truth, and it didn’t reflect well on them.

Try Him; test Him. He is trustworthy. His followers died painful deaths for what they believed to be true about Him. I believed Lance Armstrong, but I wouldn’t have died for him. I didn’t trust him that much. He is human, after all.

Ah, that would be the difference: human vs. divine. One you can never fully trust; one you can bet your life on.

Thankful today for:

774. Giggling girls

775. flowers in January

776. grades nearly done

777. people I can trust

778. old friends

779. new growth

780. scented oils in a warming bowl

781. service projects

782. shadows

783. orange juice

784. natural health care

785. my sisters, who make me smile

786. my brother, even though I never hear from him 🙂

787. worship music

788. warm sunshine streaming in my windows

 

 

More Productivity Hints

shoveling-snowTo add to my list from my last post, A Lazy Person’s Guide To Productivity, I thought of something else:

Never leave your dryer unattended. Pull things that matter out before they sit there and get wrinkled and you end up having to — shudder — iron. That goes against every lazy person’s law there is. Ironing is one of those tasks that just shouldn’t have to happen. I’ve been known to dry things with other loads because they’ve gotten left in the dryer. In fact, as I write this, there is a load just like that drying. I hate spending time ironing.

Don’t spend most of your time doing stuff you hate. Set aside time to do something you like. It will energize you. There are days when I spend all my free time in administrative household stuff. I’m the bookkeeper in my home, so I have to keep the budget, enter receipts in ibank, fill out forms, pay bills, make phone calls, etc. While I’m doing that, which I don’t actually hate, but isn’t the most fun, I watch a movie or catch up on a television show on Hulu. Of course, I can’t do that while I’m on the phone, but the pause button works for that. 🙂

Keep your house clean enough to be healthy and messy enough to be happy. I won’t ever be Martha Stewart, and I won’t have a showcase in Southern Living, but people are welcome and feel comfortable in my house. I won’t pass any white glove tests, and please don’t look under my bed, but my kitchen is clean and my eating surfaces are sanitary. I don’t like clutter, so things generally get picked up, but with three kids and multiple animals living here, there is some degree of mess that I just put up with because I love them. As some wise pundit put it, “Cleaning the house while the kids are still growing is like shoveling the walk while it’s still snowing.” Amen.

That’s all for now. Hope that helps!

Thankful today for:

764. new fishies

765. a birthday celebration

766. a spontaneous lunch date with my husband

767. my son’s first real job

768. another licensed driver in the house

769. my animals

770. a sweet, warm, dry January

771. good return policies

772. opportunities

773. life

A Lazy Person’s Guide To Productivity

to-doI have two what you might call “real” jobs: I am the copy editor for a magazine and I am a 6th grade teacher. Both of these jobs come with mandatory deadlines. I have to have things done at a certain point: procrastination isn’t an option.

In all of my other roles–wife, mom, housekeeper, etc.–I have some wiggle room, and that’s where my innate laziness kicks in. So I’ve come up with a few tricks so that things actually get done around here, but I’m not forced to manipulate my round self into a square hole.

One caveat: this doesn’t work if you have small children at home. Mine are all 10 and up, so they can do so much for themselves, plus they’re at school a good part of the day. I also start the day talking with my Creator and making sure I’m on His page. That’s the only way I’m going to get anything done.

OK, here goes, a lazy person’s guide to productivity:

1. Once you’re up, stay up. An object in motion tends to stay in motion; an object at rest tends to stay at rest. Don’t sit down until you’ve accomplished something. If you sit, all is lost.

2. If you find yourself feeling like completing some task, do it! Even if it’s in the middle of something else you were doing. Don’t let those feelings pass by; you may never get them back again!

3. If you’re doing something, and, let’s say you walk into another room to get something and see something else that needs to be done, do it! If your distractions are productive, go ahead and get distracted. For instance, if you’re looking in the refrigerator for lunch and see a bin that really needs washing, wash it! Lunch can wait. That kind of goes against the grain of every organizational, productivity guru you’re ever going to meet. They’ll tell you not to leave things half done. But, I almost always go back to what I was originally doing, especially if it involves eating. I don’t like leaving things half done either.

4. Multitask! If you’ve got laundry to fold, watch that show that’s been on your DVR forever. I always have my laptop with me when I’m watching a baseball or football game on TV. The game doesn’t need my undivided attention, and there’s always something I need to do for work or school on my computer. This only works if you’re a good multitasker. If something needs your full attention in order to be done well, don’t divide yourself.

5. If you’re going to sit down, take everything with you that you need for several different projects: mail that hasn’t been dealt with, a button that needs to be sewn on, correspondence, your laptop computer :-), a junk drawer that needs to be organized. Because once you’re down, you’re not going to be getting up for awhile :-).

6. Whenever you feel like accomplishing something, do it. Don’t talk yourself out of anything that takes energy, because you never know when that energy is going to be there. There was a day that I decided to paint one of the walls in my living room as an accent wall. I went to the store, got samples, chose a color and then did it! I think I got it accomplished in two days. Then I had to rest for a week. Just kidding.

7. Combine errands. I almost never go out for just one thing. Not only does that waste gas, but it wastes energy! Grocery shopping is one of my least favorite chores. I don’t know exactly why, but it just is. So I procrastinate that job all the time. If I have to be out for any other reason, I will get groceries then. Today, in fact, I will be combining three trips: one to my chiropractor, one to pick up my son from an after-school activity, and then to the grocery store. Of course, that means bringing my son along with me, but he doesn’t usually mind. Getting off this comfortable couch today was just too much work!

I might add to these pointers as I think of more ways to be productive. Truth is, I’ve fought against my laziness in my head for years, but I realize that I really do get a lot done, maybe just not in the traditional ways other people do them. I hope this helped!

Shared on: Death By Great Wall

Thankful today for:

753. a newly licensed driver in the house (that’ll really help with those errands)

754. movies that make me cry

755. gift cards–I just love them

756. warm January weather (I will have a lot of disagreement to that one)

757.  a still-green Christmas tree

758. people who keep their word

759. accomplishments

760. acceptance

761. music

762. books

763. cameras