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I See You

Mar1

This post is a part of the Five Minute Friday link up where we write for 5 minutes on a one-word without heavy editing and see what happens. Read all of today’s post here.

Like any typical American parents, we were armed with our video camera (this was in the days before cell phones with cameras) and waiting expectantly for our sweet tow-headed 4-year-old boy to appear on the stage for his end-of-year performance for Mom’s Day Out.

When he came out with his classmates, dressed in his green collared shirt and cute khaki pants, I looked through the viewfinder of the camera to make sure I could get him in focus before things began.

 

What I noticed as I watched him through that lens was that he was looking all around the crowded church sanctuary, searching for us. I could read his little lips saying, “Where ARE they?” as his gaze grew concerned. David and I waved our arms and halfway stood trying to get his attention, but the lights were too bright on the stage, and there were too many bodies in the auditorium.

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He couldn’t see us.

Once the music started, he was happy singing along and doing the hand motions as he’d been taught, and I recorded him and clapped when it was done. But my heart was a little sad. I so wanted him to know that we were watching him. That we were there. That we cared.

Now, 18 years later, that little 4-year-old is 22 and searching for who he is. During a crisis time just a few months ago, I wrote him a letter reminding him of that night all those years ago and asking him, “Do you see us now? Do you know that we see you, that we’re here for you, that we love you?”

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Hagar gave God the name El Roi in Genesis 16:13, “She gave this name to the Lord who spoke to her: ‘You are the God who sees me,’ for she said, ‘I have now seen the One who sees me.’”

 

 

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Trusting in the Justice of God

Feb22

This post is a part of the Five Minute Friday link up. I write for 5 minutes on a one-word prompt and see what happens. Today’s prompt is “just.” Check out all the other posts here.

I heard recently about a 2-year-old little girl who was just diagnosed with a form of ovarian cancer.

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I have 3 friends currently battling breast cancer.

I have another friend who is at this moment awaiting results from blood tests to find out if her 22-year-old daughter’s mass is cancerous or not.

All I can do is pray, weep with them, and trust that Deuteronomy 32:4 is true: “He is the Rock, his works are perfect, and all his ways are just. A faithful God who does no wrong, upright and just is he” (New International Version).

Do those situations look just? Not to our eyes. But if we can’t trust the character of God, all is lost.

Theologian and author Nancy Guthrie knows a bit about the justice and goodness of God. In a podcast interview with Lina Abujamra, she talks about hope, and her perspective is that we live in a broken world, and bad things happen. But God. It’s not all about us.

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I’m about to head out to a weekend women’s retreat where we will be hearing via video from Sharon Hodde Miller about taking our eyes off ourselves. Her book “Free of Me” is a must read for anyone who thinks life’s not fair or that anything at all is about them.

That would be all of us, wouldn’t it? My marriage is not about me. My family is not about me. My calling is not about me. It’s all about God. I can choose to let my circumstances dictate how I see God, or I can let God be the filter for how I see my circumstances.

If I want any joy in this life, the latter is the better choice.

ALL His ways are just.

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Confident In My Construction

Feb15

This post is a part of the Five Minute Friday link up. I write on a one-word prompt for just 5 minutes without any heavy editing and see what happens. Today’s prompt is the word “confident.” Check out the other posts this week.

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I’m a big fan of the podcast by Ryan O’Neal, aka the musical artist Sleeping At Last. He takes apart the pieces that he creates to let his listeners in on the process he goes through to build his music. It’s fascinating.

He has a series of songs he’s based on the Enneagram. If you’re not familiar with the Enneagram, click above for some info.

He invites as his guest on each of the podcasts about the Enneagram songs writer and activist Chris Heuertz, who is the author of The Sacred Enneagram. Chris helps break down each type and explain a little more about them and what makes them unique and special. He also gives tips for each type on how they can grow to be the best version of themselves.

enneagramI’m a Type 9, so I’m still waiting to learn more about my type. Ryan has only written up through Type 8. Nine will be Ryan’s last piece in this series. What comes to mind for me in listening to these songs is what the Apostle Paul told the Philippian church after saying he was thankful for them and was praying for them: “being confident of this, that He who began a good work in your will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus” (Philippians 1:6, New International Version).

Isn’t that great news?

He’s not finished with me yet.

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Sleeping at Last podcast image via the SAL Facebook page

Take That, Gates of Hell

Feb8

This post is a part of the Five Minute Friday link up. I write for 5 minutes with no heavy editing and see what happens. To read all the posts for this week, click here.

In Matthew chapter 16 we are shown a dialog between Jesus and His disciples in which Jesus asks them who people are saying that He is. Some say He is Elijah, some say He is John the Baptist come back from the dead. That one never made sense to me since Jesus and John were alive at the same time, but I digress.

Jesus then asks them, “Who do you say that I am?” And Peter speaks up, “You are the Christ, the Son of the Living God.”

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Jesus applauds this statement, telling Peter that it’s not something he came up with on his own, but that was revealed to him by the Father. And then He says this, “And I tell you, you are Peter, and on this rock I will build my church, and the gates of hell shall not prevail against it” (Matthew 16:18).

Note that: I will build My church. It’s not our job.

I didn’t think a lot about that statement until fairly recently when my pastor and I were talking about the religious climate in America. He reminded me that the church is safe. It may have to go underground, but the gates of hell will not prevail against it. He is doing the building. Not us. Not our great programs and beautiful buildings and charismatic preachers.

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No matter what, we don’t have to worry about the church, we don’t have to worry about Jesus, we don’t have to worry about the Scriptures. God can do that plenty fine by Himself, and you know what?

We know who wins in the end.

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Where Else Is There To Go?

Feb1

This post is a part of the Five Minute Friday link up. I write for 5 minutes on a one-word prompt. No heavy editing. I just see where it takes me. Today’s prompt is “where.”

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In the Gospel of John, chapter 6, we are told the story of Jesus feeding the 5000. There were actually more than that, because that was just the number of men. Amazing story. Truly incredible.

The very next story is about Jesus walking on the water. Wow. OK, so that’s pretty awesome.

After that, we are told of the hard things that Jesus told the crowd, and then things He said to His disciples alone. These things were so difficult, that John records “After this, many of his disciples turned back and no longer walked with him” (6:66).

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How heartbreaking that must have been for Jesus. They had just seen what He had done. In the next couple of verses, this conversation takes place: “So Jesus said to the twelve, ‘Do you want to go away as well?’ Simon Peter answered him, ‘Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life, and we have believed, and have come to know, that you are the Holy One of God’” (6:67-68).

In other words, “Where else is there to go?” Jesus had said He was the Way, the Truth and the Life. No one could come to the Father except through Him. He was the bread of life. He was the living water. No one else had made the claims He had. No one else was offering eternal life.

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It was either walking with Jesus and having life and joy, or walking away into eternal sorrow.

Choose life and joy.

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